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That Healthy Chica Blog


Filtering by Category: Author's Corner

How to Cope When The Walls Seem to Be Closing In

judy finelli

It's been some time since I've sat down to blog and create stuff that I actually felt like sharing with the world.  As many of you know, I'm not one to put work out without meaning or purpose attached to it. I'm also a very private person in many ways but when something happens in my life that needs to come to light in order for me to move forward, I am not very shy to express it.

If you are new to my blog, I aim to write about nutrition, wellness, and lifestyle topics that I hope will be helpful to you. I also share personal posts here and there of relevance because I never like to sugar coat the real shit that comes up from time to time.

So this is where I've been and realize that..

They'll inevitably be times in life when the walls feel like they are closing in and the road ahead seems unclear.

I firmly believe that when this happens, courage and love are beckoned to keep the mind clear to figure out what to do next. I also believe that having faith and optimism are equally important in order to not lose perspective of what truly matters.

I participated in the #BornandMade Campaign a couple years ago.. seems more poignant today than it did then.   

I participated in the #BornandMade Campaign a couple years ago.. seems more poignant today than it did then.


So this is what I know for sure (Oprah has just now entered my line of thought)..

No one goes into a deeply, loving relationship thinking that things will fail.  I think we typically go into any partnership with optimism and joy that all will be okay and that anything that may come could be overcome..together.  It's an awesome feeling, right? Comforting even, I would say.  

It's fucking scary as shit when you realize that things are not what they used to be..that things are not what you both want them to be.. Or worse..

It's even scarier when kids are in the picture and you have to dissect every action and decision in order to be 100% sure that you are doing right by them AT ALL TIMES.  Then you pray that you are doing the right thing as parents and as individuals and once again, hope for the best.

The path I was on has changed and I need to continue believing that it is in the best interest of all involved.  I need to believe that all will be fine regardless of what the road ahead looks like; and that I'll continue to handle it with grace, courage, love, patience and even with the occasional tears that will certainly fall.

If you are going through some kind of transition in your life, especially in your relationship (s), rest assured that all you are feeling will pass.  It'll get better each day even when it feels like you are alone in the world and no one understands how lonely you truly feel.

Coping with change and the feeling that the walls are closing in on you is a scary thing for sure but it can also be liberating once your perspective shifts to a more positive state. When it does, here are some things I think are helpful:

  1. Make your overall wellness your top priority.. keep moving, stay busy and don't forget to nourish yourself and give yourself extra love.

  2. Make time for nature and connect with the world around you.

  3. Find your tribe.. your true friends will always be there and so will your family (if you have a supportive one)

  4. Connect with professionals such as coaches, counselors, therapists, etc. who can unbiasedly give you direction when you feel out of sorts.

  5. Keep a journal of what's going on.. what's in your heart? The times when you feel your most vulnerable and lonely, are perfect for spilling it all on those pages.

  6. Don't feel obligated to explain yourself to anyone who asks "what's wrong?".. do and say what feels right. Period. 

  7. Sit with your feelings and grieve.. cry if you have to and release it all.


I hope this post resonates with you somehow; and if it does please share it and let me know your thoughts in the comments below. I'd love to hear from you.. 








Woah! Revelations, Aha's, Transitions..and Summer Goodness.. Ooh.. This Is a Good One!

judy finelli

Hey guys! 

So, I took a brief pause from blogging this week and was out in nature every single day.  It felt amazing to just be with my thoughts every morning and breathe fresh air deeply and meditatively as I yearned to run but honored my knees instead.  Not that this is a foreign concept to me because I love being outside any chance I get, but to be honest, after drop off, I typically head straight to my office and start working or do my workouts at home while Federico is within reach, or maybe head to Whole Foods to be inspired to create my next recipe and meet up with people.

But this week was different.. it’s as if I desperately needed to be out by myself reflecting and using the sounds around me for inspiration.  Those melodies came from people bustling to catch the morning train, others walking to the gym, while many were greeting the day with seemingly the same gusto I had.  As I walked through Bronxville, I felt a sense of peace that I had not felt in some time.. maybe even months.  I’ve yet to figure out why but as I walked and recorded my thoughts on my phone, I came to the not so obvious realization that writing has been my trusted companion since I remember learning to speak english as my second language. The truth is, I’ve always secretly considered myself a writer but never truly announced it or revealed it to the world until over a year ago. Because really, who cares, right? 

 Even then, this extrovert had been kind of timid about embracing it as the gift it is and using it beyond the pages of my journals and blog.  On my walks, I said hello to this new vocation in a way I had not before and have made the very real decision to not just freelance write editorial projects but to give life and a voice to the stories that many wellness professionals and passionate creatives who are making it happen and honestly don’t have the time or even the mental bandwidth to worry about copy for their website or marketing materials.  

As a natural storyteller, this is something I really enjoy and know I’m great at it.  It’s hilarious to think of this as a current “a-ha” moment because not only has writing been with me the longest but I remember always WANTING to write.  I wasn’t forced.. I just liked the idea of putting my thoughts down on paper and seeing where the heck my fantasies would actually lead me to create. What picture did I just paint with my words and was it easy to understand for the person reading it?  It didn’t matter because it was simply for pleasure and my peepers only, thank you.

Now, I totally know that incorporating copywriting to my professional life beyond my published pieces and private ones, is something that’ll keep my fire lit because I wake up every morning with the desire to breathe life onto a blank page with my own words pretty much on a regular basis.

So I’m insanely stoked and thrilled to currently share as the dual shall I say two story home for both health conscious, fab women seeking to look, feel and be their best simply by eating well and tossing the ball n’ chain way of eating they may currently have; with amazingly dedicated health coaches, wellness professionals and passionate creatives seeking to have the weight lifted off their shoulders of having to write their own copy when they prefer to be changing lives with the other God given gifts they possess.

The week ended by the way with a killer 1:1 two hour cooking class in my home.  It was just my client and I and my two kiddos in the background but it was so awesome and I loved teaching her ways to nourish herself and her family beyond what she had learned during our six month health coaching program.

All in all it was a fantastic week and I’m happy to be posting on a Sunday night.. maybe this will become a thing..

Hope you had a fab weekend and I’m so looking forward to kicking butt this week. What are you anticipating this week will bring for you?  Would love to hear in the comments.  


Oh, and by the way.. before I go.. did you see that my 1:1 Health Coaching summer program is opening up June 1st?  Check it out here.  I have spots available for this awesome 90 day program because I know we all love to chill and enjoy summer and all it brings but also want to look and feel our best when the temps heat up.  So, here’s where you go if you’re interested..




If you’re a fab coach, wellness professional or artist seeking copywriting services, I have a feeling I’m your Girl (or I could be, or.. you know what I mean ;)… let’s chat about that too.. click here and let’s put those worries to bed.


Ta for now and as always.. lots of love!


xx ~Jude


What Lights Me Up About Health Coaching

judy finelli

    Today I received an awesome text ...

I wasn't expecting it at all.  I often do 60-90 minutes clarity calls because I feel that it's impossible to get a feel for a person and how I could be of service if I were to meet them for half hour.  To be honest, the shortest meeting that I will have with someone is 50 minutes and that truly depends on the circumstance.

So the text I received was from a sweet guy who was super appreciative to have met for the 90 minute session. He went on to say how life changing it was to be heard and the feeling that he left with after our session.  Honestly, I didn't expect to receive such an awesome random message.. it was deeply heart felt and my heart was is still full of joy knowing that I made another human being feel this way.

One of the many things that I love about being a holistic health & lifestyle coach is that I meet so many different people from varying walks of life but who truly are going through similar situations.  At the end of the day, what I've learned from speaking with them intimately, is that we all want to be heard.. we all want to matter.. and we all feel like there is more we can offer the world by simply being ourselves. When we feel good about ourselves we are able to go through life with more confidence and awareness of what works for us and what doesn’t.  I find that when we begin a personal development journey, we not only discover who we really are but what we stand for.. and what serves us as well as what no longer fuels our spirit.

I’m lit up by the aspects of health coaching that encompass self discovery.  One client I worked with last year had a revelation about food that she never even considered.  She didn’t realize how much her work environment played a role in her food choices.  Since she didn’t want to disappoint any of her co-workers when they brought food into the workplace during gatherings, she found herself often eating crappy foods that were keeping her fat and unhealthy and as a result, frustrated, tired and not her best self.

Another aspect of health coaching that lights me up is when a client discovers the feelings connected to the food she is eating.  I love the lightbulb that goes off when she realizes that she will no longer ignore those feeling around food because it gives her clues as to what her body needs and what it could do without.  That intuition that suddenly becomes apparent is so deeply amazing andI love getting clients to that point of discovery.

I also love teaching people about the different dietary lifestyles out there that are perfect for them.  Knowing that there isn’t a “diet” attached to this work and that each person is honored, makes a client feel awesome because I’m not here to push a certain diet or plan but to discover together what will work for her and what would be sustainable.

The icing on the cake is knowing that the client trusts me enough to share the most intimate details in order to breakthrough.  The psychology behind this work is one that I truly love and am fired up about daily.  It just doesn’t feel like work which I am so grateful and incredibly blessed to do.

Frankly, I am lit up by teaching about primary foods which is what we refer to the areas of one’s life that have nothing to do with food but effect us just as profoundly.  Our relationships, spiritual practices, our careers, family and home life are all primary foods.  When I start a program with a client, the first area that I begin to work with is cleaning up their nutritional habits and creating balance that is attainable and sustainable.  This is called secondary foods.  Once you have balance in this area, it is easier and important to look at the primary foods with a close lens and work through any areas that need nurturing.


I believe that when we ingest quality nutrition and we have awareness of what our body is telling us, we can all become intuitive about what we truly need and desire.  I know it may sound silly, but once you clean up the gunk in your body by eating clean, the door to remarkable possibilities opens up widely.  If you have children, you are also able to teach them what you are learning so it’s a win win for your loved ones as well.

Lastly, health coaching is something that is incredibly life changing.  When I see someone making life changes because they finally know what foods actually benefit their bodies and which are harmful, they feel equipped to valiantly tackle other areas of their lives that may have kept them stuck.  They work out with confidence and without frustration because they know how to eat and get the best results out of their exercise routines.  They are also able to tap into methods of stress relief in order to achieve a more calm disposition that may not have been able to achieve alone.

Does any of this resonate with you? 

Are there any questions you have about health coaching or health in general that you would want to know about on this blog?  Let me know in the comments below.  If you’d like to learn more about health coaching or are interested in possibly working together, join my 5-Day Diet Clean Up Challenge coming up on March 7th or simply send me a note here.


To your Great Health..

Be Well,